Advice To My Younger Self

🔹️ Have confidence to be yourself.

🔹️ Don’t let people’s judgement define who you are.

🔹️ Follow Your Dreams.

🔹️ Surround Yourself With Positivity.

🔹️ Remove All Negative People From Your Life.

🔹️ Trust Your Intuition.

🔹️ You Can Achieve Anything When You Put Your Mind To It.

🔹️ You Are Not Perfect. That’s Okay; No One Is Perfect. Perfection Doesn’t Exist In This World.

🔹️ It’s Alright To Make Mistakes.

🔹️ We Learn From Our Mistakes.

🔹️ There Will Always Be Someone Smarter Than You; That’s Okay!

🔹️ Valuable Friendships Last Forever.

🔹️ Be Happy In Life.

🔹️ Don’t Let Your Disabilities/Chronic Illnesses Define Who You Are.

🔹️Always Believe In Your Abilities.

🔹️ Spread Kindness Everywhere You Go.

🔹️ There will be people who will not like you for no reason. Accept It and Move on.

🔹️ Never Loose Hope.

🔹️ Be Proud of Who You Are.

🔹️ You Can Do Anything If You Put Your Mind To It.

🔹️ Don’t Be Afraid to Speak Up and Spread Awareness.

🔹️ Your Mental Health Should Be Your #1 Priority!

🔹️ Smile Often.

There are so many advices I wished I learned when I was younger. It could of changed my mindset now that I’m an adult. Thinking back, I was never surrounded with positive influences, therefore, I had to learn all these lessons the hard way. By living through the experiences instead of getting the heads up, I was fortunate to accept my flaws naturally and see the world in two separate ways. The world is filled with able-bodied and people with disabilities. I would get the most common question from judgemental individuals: Which world do I belong in? They asked me that because I’m diagnosed with right hemiplegia cerebral palsy since birth. In short term: my left side is perfectly normal while my right side is not. My answer to them is simply: I belong in both worlds.

All the advices I written above made me realise that I had no voice back then. Now that I know I can be in both societies, I am able to spread these advices to the next generation and hope they won’t make the same mistakes that I did. I’m hoping for a change in people’s behaviour and also to watch if the next generation will be accepting and be kind to others.


My Story With Social Anxiety

Mental health is a state of well-being where an individual can cope with everyday stresses and can control their emotional abilities. Social anxiety is a type of anxiety disorder that causes extreme fear in social settings often because the individual knows that there will be negative judgement around them. It is often linked to a history of emotional abuse, bullying, and teasing. Talking about mental health was a taboo many years ago. I struggled in my early adulthood to voiced out my concerns, however, no one would believed what I said. Their ignorance overshadowed the truth and, therefore, I developed social anxiety because there was lack of communication within a group of people I thought I could trust.

As an individual living with a disability and a chronic illness, we are often pushed aside and lived in the shadows of abled-bodied people. I remembered I was targeted many times for my intellect, my mobility, and my personality. They treated me like I was a hindrance human being. The result from their behaviour made me felt alone and vulnerable. After the multiple experiences, I had trouble speaking and confiding with people I known for years. I started to decline from society. I would stay quiet whenever I meet new people because I know I would receive a negative response/judgement. I never realised by staying silent I was emotionally harming myself.

I realised by removing negative people from my life, permanently, that my social anxiety was only temporary. I began to surround myself with positive influences. I have confidence in myself to speak to others directly again. Often, I come across people who have different life experiences than me and we often have disagreements. I would explain my past emotional situation to avoid negative confrontation and hope that history does not repeat itself. Don’t let people’s judgement cloud your ability to interact with others. Have confidence and find your own voice within yourself.

I have listed the most common social anxiety symptoms below. I hope my story inspired you to help others in this difficult time during the pandemic.


Self-Care 101 (Lockdown Style)

Self-care is influenced by an individual’s attitude and behaviour. Self-care encourages us to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves and with people around us. There is a misunderstanding that taking care of and loving oneself is a “selfish” behaviour. I would disagree with this statement because how can we care and show love to others if we cannot put ourselves as first priority. I learned throughout the pandemic that I must put myself first during many lockdowns so my mental health is not affected. Here are my lockdown self care tips.

My Top 10

– Never start your day with negative thoughts

– Plan a daily schedule or routine

– Connect with people who has the same interest as you

– Spend time outdoors in nature

– Take a break from technology

– Clean & Organise

– Listen to calming music

– Meditation

– Reading

– Surrounding yourself with positive people

I will list more tips below during this tough time everyone is in. I hope everyone is taking care of themselves.


Accepting Your Imperfections

Happy New Year Everyone!!

I’ve been watching a lot of Netflix programmes over the holidays; one of the programmes caught my attention and became my absolute favourite. Bridgerton is set in 1813 Regency-era England where eight close-knit siblings attempt to find love. Season 1 is centric around Daphne Bridgerton, the eldest Bridgerton daughter and the fourth child of the family. She falls madly in love with Simon Basset, The Duke of Hastings. However, their love story has many turbulence, angst, and trials.

During childhood, Simon had a speech impediment which was rejected by his cruel father. His father wanted perfection from Simon; when it was not achieved, the late duke did not accept Simon as a son. After the rejection, young Simon was aided by Lady Danbury, a maternal figure to him. She helped him overcame his stammer. In the present day, Daphne found the truth behind Simon’s speech impediment via Simon’s letters she found in a drawer. During the Hastings’ ball, Daphne told Simon she love all of him including his flaws and imperfections. He doesn’t need to be perfect to become worthy of love.

In reality, everyone has flaws and imperfections. Perfection does not exist in this world. We have to be comfortable to accept our flaws and show it publicly. Our flaws and imperfections are what makes us unique. In my own personal experience, it took the majority of my adulthood to accept who I really am. People kept saying I cannot do this or that because of my disability and my chronic illness. I nearly believed them. However, I did not let their words get to me. I, finally, moved forward in life when I stopped and removed the negative thoughts from my mind. Just like Daphne, the Duchess of Hastings, find someone or find people who will accept you as you really are. Once you find them, don’t throw that relationship away because these kinds of people are extremely rare in this world.

I encourage everyone to watch Bridgerton. It is a beautifully written and very romantic series based on the Bridgerton books by Julia Quinn. Season 2 is coming soon. I can’t wait to continue the series of the Bridgerton family.

Duke and Duchess of Hastings